you might think I am childish but you are not me

once again

I am here to talk about family

it's already a "must" post every semester break when I'm at hometown

please skip this post if you think I am unrespect to parents

hmmm

a very hundred time I hope to escape from this family

and a very thousand time I am admire my friend family

they are happy without a lot of arguement

and most important is they having whose parents can make jokes, understand chilren, and willing to communicate with children without control them in traditional way

I know

the ideal family in my mind is a western style family

every member in family even children have their freedom and right in action and spoken words besides respect to elders

and most important is TWO way communication is conduct in the family

the feedback children given to parents every time during arguement wont be rejected by parents

feedback in two way communication is a clue to help to solve the conflict

but should not to be seen as a resistance

although I am study in Chinese school either primary school or secondary school

but it's doesn't matter that I should follow the Chinese traditional style in my lifestyle

I would prefer to practice western style most of the time 

I am not here to criticize Chinese traditional but to praise western style

however

from what I can observe through my family

I am seriously dislike the conservative mind of Chinese traditional

one main point in the style is

Discrimanation

my family only have daughter as my sister and me without any son

and so I can realize how the conservative the Chinese traditional is

girl should be stay at home and should not going out too often

better if they no go out

cannot go to far place

girl must not back home late than 12am at night

and so on

and it make me think of I might go to do plastic surgery to become a guy

I know I might be brave sometimes

WTF

fine

I know I am still not prepare yet to escape from this family to fight for my freedom

so

the Chinise traditional in my family have force me to CHANGE 

whatever thing they no allow

I DO IT

without their consent

it's means that I done it secretly

I won't share with you here as these are secret

but I can tell you

I am not a good daughter in their standard aways

I choose to not let them know is just because I am prepare for my plan

but not to scare to be blamed or scold

one day

my plan will be achieved 

soon

hmmm

when I took my course of PR

the main reason is because I want to improve my communication skill with them besides no any idea of what courses to study

but after 2 years of my diploma life

I am still can't found the way to improve it

maybe is because my personality of can't forgive what they have done to me

or because I already disappointed with the family

so I choose to give up

don't try to console me anything related to how to improve relationship with them

maybe your advice will work but the problem is

I already lost trust and effort

sure

since I dislike my family

so I am very hate semester break and CNY

that's why I will very late on back to hometown after exam

 ~the end~